Daf 49b (דַּף מ״ט ע״ב)

And concerning this we are aroused by what is written [Bereshit 28] (וְעַל דָּא אִתְעַרְנָא דִּכְתִיב): “And he encountered the place and lodged there” (וַיִּפְגַּע בַּמָּקוֹם וַיָּלֶן שָׁם) - for he first obtained permission (דְּנָטִיל רְשׁוּ בְּקַדְמִיתָא). From here we learn (מִכָּאן אוֹלִיפְנָא) that one who connects with his wife must first encounter her and sweeten her with words (דְּמָאן דְּמִתְחַבֵּר בְּאִנְתְּתֵיהּ בָּעֵי לְמִפְגַּע לָהּ וּלְבַסְמָא לָהּ בְּמִלִּין), and if not, he should not (וְאִי לָאו לָא) come to her (יָבִית לְגַבָּהּ), so that their desire be united (בְּגִין דִּיהֵא רְעוּתָא דִלְהוֹן כְּחֲדָא), and not forced (בִּדְלָא אֲנִיסוּ).

“And he lodged there because the sun had set” (וַיָּלֶן שָׁם כִּי בָּא הַשֶּׁמֶשׁ) - to show (לְאַחֲזָאָה) that it is forbidden for a man to engage in marital relations during the day (דְּאָסִיר לֵיהּ לְבַר נָשׁ לְשַׁמְּשָׁא עַרְסֵיהּ בִּימָמָא). “And he took from the stones of the place and placed them at his head” (וַיִּקַּח מֵאַבְנֵי הַמָּקוֹם וַיָּשֶׂם מְרַאֲשׁוֹתָיו) - here we learn (הָכָא אוֹלִיפְנָא) that even if a king has golden beds and fine garments to lie in (דַּאֲפִילוּ יְהוֹן לְמַלְכָּא עַרְסֵי דְּדַהֲבָא וּלְבוּשֵׁי יְקָר לְמֵיבַת בְּהוּ), and the Matronita prepares for him a bed made of stones (וּמַטְרוֹנִיתָא תַּתְקֵין לֵיהּ עַרְסָא מִתְתַּקַּן בְּאַבְנִין), he should leave his own and lie in what she prepares (יִשְׁבּוֹק דִּילֵיהּ וְיָבֵית בַּמֶּה דְּאִיהִי תַּתְקִין), as it is written: “And he lay down in that place” (דִּכְתִיב: וַיִּשְׁכַּב בַּמָּקוֹם הַהוּא).

Come and see (תָּא חֲזֵי), what is written here? “And the man said, this time…” (מַה כְּתִיב הָכָא: וַיֹּאמֶר הָאָדָם זֹאת הַפַּעַם וְגו׳) - behold, with soft words (הָא בְּסִימוּ דְּמִלִּין), to draw affection with her (לְאַמְשְׁכָא עִמָּהּ חֲבִיבוּתָא), and to draw her [some say: with her] to his desire (וּלְאַמְשָׁכָא לָהּ [עִמָּהּ] לִרְעוּתֵיהּ), to arouse with her love (לְאַתְעָרָא עִמָּהּ רְחִימוּתָא). See how many soft signs there are in these words (חֲמֵי כַּמָּה בְּסִימִין אִנּוּן מִלִּין), how many words of love they are (כַּמָּה מִלֵּי דִּרְחִימוּתָא אִנּוּן): “Bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” (עֶצֶם מֵעֲצָמַי וּבָשָׂר מִבְּשָׂרִי), to show her that they are one (בְּגִין לְאַחֲזָאָה לָהּ דְּאִנּוּן חַד), and there is no separation between them in anything (וְלָא אִית פֵּירוּדָא בֵּינַיְיהוּ בְּכֹלָּא).

Now he began to praise her (הַשְׁתָּא שָׁרֵי לְשַׁבָּחָא לָהּ). “Therefore shall she be called woman” (לְזֹאת יִקָּרֵא אִשָּׁה) - this is she, that none other like her will be found (דָּא הִיא דְּלָא יִשְׁתַּכַּח כַּוָּותָהּ). This is the splendor of the house (דָּא הִיא יְקָרָא דְּבֵיתָא); all women before her are like monkeys before human beings (כֻּלְּהוֹן נָשִׁין גַּבָּהּ כְּקוֹפָא בִּפְנֵי בְּנֵי נָשָׁא). But “therefore shall she be called woman” (אֲבָל לְזֹאת יִקָּרֵא אִשָּׁה) - she is the perfection of all (שְׁלִימוּ דְּכֹלָּא), for this one and not for another (לְזֹאת וְלָא לְאַחֲרָא). All is filled with affection (כֹּלָּא הוּא מָלֵי רְחִימוּתָא), as it is said [Mishlei 31] (כְּמָא דְאַתְּ אָמֵר): “Many daughters have done valiantly, but you have ascended above them all” (רַבּוֹת בָּנוֹת עָשׂוּ חָיִל וְאַתְּ עָלִית עַל כֻּלָּנָה).

“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother and cleave to his wife, and they shall be one flesh” (עַל כֵּן יַעֲזָב אִישׁ אֶת אָבִיו וְאֶת אִמּוֹ וְדָבַק בְּאִשְׁתּוֹ וְהָיוּ לְבָשָׂר אֶחָד) - all in order to draw her with love (כֹּלָּא לְאַמְשָׁכָא לָהּ בִּרְחִימוּ), and to cleave to her (וּלְאִתְדַּבְּקָא בַּהֲדָהּ). Once all these words are aroused toward her (כֵּיוָן דְּאִתְעַר לְגַבָּהּ כָּל מִלִּין אִלֵּין), what is written? “And the serpent was cunning…” (מַה כְּתִיב: וְהַנָּחָשׁ הָיָה עָרוּם וְגו׳). Behold - the evil inclination was aroused to grasp her (הָא אִתְעַר יֵצֶר הָרָע לְאַחֲדָא בָּהּ), in order to bind her with bodily desire (בְּגִין לְקָשְׁרָא לָהּ בְּתִיאוּבְתָּא דְּגוּפָא), and to arouse toward her other words in which the evil inclination delights (וּלְאַתְעָרָא לְגַבָּהּ מִלִּין אָחֳרָנִין דְּיֵצֶר הָרָע אִתְעַנַּג בְּהוּ).

Until later, what is written? “And the woman saw that the tree was good for food and desirable to the eyes, and she took of its fruit and ate” (עַד לְבָתַר מַה כְּתִיב: וַתֵּרֶא הָאִשָּׁה כִּי טוֹב הָעֵץ לְמַאֲכָל וְכִי תַאֲוָה הוּא לָעֵינַיִם וַתִּקַּח מִפִּרְיוֹ וַתֹּאכַל). She received him with will (קְבֵילַת לֵיהּ בִּרְעוּתָא), and gave also to her man with her [and he ate] (וַתִּתֵּן גַּם לְאִישָׁהּ עִמָּהּ [וַיֹּאכַל]). With desire (בְּתַאֲבָה) Behold, then she is aroused toward him with desire (הָא כְּדֵין הִיא אִתְעֲרָא לְגַבֵּיהּ בְּתִיאוּבְתָּא), Some say: with craving (נ״א: בְּתַאֲוּבְתָּא), to arouse [some say: to give] him desire and love (לְאַתְעָרָא [נ״א: לְמֵיהַב] לֵיהּ רְעוּתָא וּרְחִימוּ). This matter is to demonstrate conduct to human beings (דָּא מִלָּה לְאַחֲזָאָה עוֹבָדָא לִבְנֵי נָשָׁא), in the likeness of what is Above (כְּגַוְונָא דִּלְעֵילָא).

Rabbi El‘azar said (אָמַר רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר): if so, how do we judge Above the evil inclination that grasped the female? (אִי הָכִי בְּמַאי נוֹקִים לֵיהּ לְעֵילָא יֵצֶר הָרָע דְּאָחִיד בָּהּ בְּנוּקְבָא) He said to him: behold - these were aroused Above and Below (אָמַר לֵיהּ: הָא אִתְעֲרָא אִלֵּין לְעֵילָא וְאִלֵּין לְתַתָּא), the good inclination and the evil inclination (יֵצֶר טוֹב וְיֵצֶר רָע). The good inclination is from the right (יֵצֶר טוֹב מִיָּמִינָא), and the evil inclination is from the left (וְיֵצֶר רָע מִשְּׂמָאלָא), and the left Above grasped the female to bind her together [some say: to be bound in him] (וּשְׂמָאלָא לְעֵילָא אָחִיד בְּנוּקְבָא לְקַשְׁרָא לָהּ כְּחֲדָא [נ״א: לְאִתְקַשְּׁרָא בֵּיהּ]) in the body, as it is said [Shir haShirim 2] (בְּגוּפָא כְּמָא דְאַתְּ אָמֵר): “His left hand is under my head…” (שְׂמֹאלוֹ תַּחַת לְרֹאשִׁי וְגו׳). And on this matter, words were explained Above and Below until here (וְעַל דָּא מִלִּין אִתְפַּרְשָׁן לְעֵילָא וְתַתָּא עַד הָכָא). From here on - words in brief [some say: in brief explanation] (מִכָּאן וּלְהָלְאָה: מִלִּין בְּזוּטְרָא [נ״א: בְּזוּטְרָא] דְּזִיפְתָּא), for the small ones who suckle (לִזְעִירֵיהּ דְּטִינְקִין), to separate the word (לְפָרְשָׁא מִלָּה), and behold - the friends were aroused with it (וְהָא אִתְעָרוּ בֵּיהּ חַבְרַיָּיא).

Rabbi Shim‘on was going to Tiverya (רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן הֲוָה אָזִיל לִטְבֶרְיָה), and with him were Rabbi Yosei and Rabbi Yehudah and Rabbi Ḥiyya (וְהֲווּ עִמֵּיהּ רַבִּי יוֹסֵי וְרַבִּי יְהוּדָה וְרַבִּי חִיָּיא). Meanwhile they saw Rabbi Pincḥas approaching (אַדְּהָכִי חָמוּ לֵיהּ לְרַבִּי פִּנְחָס דְּהֲוָה אָתֵי). When they all joined together (כֵּיוָן דְּאִתְחַבָּרוּ כְּחֲדָא), they went down and sat beneath one tree of the trees of the mountain (נַחֲתוּ וְיָתְבוּ תְּחוֹת אִילָנָא חַד מֵאִילָנֵי טוּרָא). Rabbi Pincḥas said (אָמַר רַבִּי פִּנְחָס): Here I sit to hear some of those sublime matters that you speak each day (הָא יָתִיבְנָא מֵאִלֵּין מִלֵּי מַעַלְיָיתָא דְּאַתְּ אָמֵר בְּכָל יוֹמָא בְּעֵינָא לְמִשְׁמַע).

Rabbi Shim‘on opened and said (פָּתַח רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן וְאָמַר): “And he went on his journeys from the Negev as far as Beit El, to the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Beit El and the Ai” [Bereshit 13] (וַיֵּלֶךְ לְמַסָּעָיו מִנֶּגֶב וְעַד בֵּית־אֵל עַד הַמָּקוֹם אֲשֶׁר הָיָה שָׁם אָהֳלוֹ בַּתְּחִלָּה בֵּין בֵּית־אֵל וּבֵין הָעָי). “On his journeys” - it should have said on his journey (וַיֵּלֶךְ לְמַסָּעָיו - לְמַסָּעוֹ מִבָּעֵי לֵיהּ). What is on his journeys? (מַאי לְמַסָּעָיו) Rather, these are two travelers (אֶלָּא תְּרֵין מַטְלָנִין אִנּוּן): one is his own (חַד דִּידֵיהּ), and one is that of the Shekhinta (וְחַד דִּשְׁכִינְתָּא). For every person must be found as male and female (דְּהָא כָּל בַּר נָשׁ בָּעֵי לְאִשְׁתַּכְּחָא דְּכַר וְנוּקְבָא), in order to strengthen faith (בְּגִין לְאַתְקָפָא מְהֵימְנוּתָא), and then the Shekhinta never separates from him (וּכְדֵין שְׁכִינְתָּא לָא אִתְפָּרְשָׁא מִנֵּיהּ לְעָלְמִין). And if you say that one who goes on the road without male and female, the Shekhinta separates from him? (וְאִי תֵימָא: מָאן דְּנָפִיק לְאוֹרְחָא דְּלָא אִשְׁתְּכַח דְּכַר וְנוּקְבָא, שְׁכִינְתָּא אִתְפָּרְשָׁא מִנֵּיהּ)

Come and see (תָּא חֲזֵי): this one who goes on the way [daf 168a] (הַאי מָאן דְּנָפִיק לְאָרְחָא]), should arrange prayer before Kudsha Berikh Hu (יְסַדֵּר צְלוֹתָא קַמֵּי קוּדְשָׁא בְּרִיךְ הוּא), in order to draw upon himself the Shekhinta of his Master (בְּגִין לְאַמְשָׁכָא עֲלֵיהּ שְׁכִינְתָּא דְּמָרֵיהּ), before he goes on the road (עַד לָא יִפּוּק לְאָרְחָא), at a time when male and female are found (בְּזִמְנָא דְּאִשְׁתְּכַח דְּכַר וְנוּקְבָא). Once he arranges his prayer and praise (כֵּיוָן דְּסַדַּר צְלוֹתֵיהּ וְשִׁבְחֵיהּ), and the Shekhinta rests upon him (וּשְׁכִינְתָּא שָׁרְיָיא עֲלֵיהּ), then he may go out (יִפּוּק). For the Shekhinta is joined with him (דְּהָא שְׁכִינְתָּא אִזְדַּוְוגַת בַּהֲדֵיהּ), so that male and female be found (בְּגִין דְּיִשְׁתְּכַח דְּכַר וְנוּקְבָא). Male and female in the city (דְּכַר וְנוּקְבָא בְּמָתָא), male and female in the field (דְּכַר וְנוּקְבָא בְּחַקְלָא). This is what is written [Tehillim 85] (הֲדָא הוּא דִכְתִיב): “Righteousness shall go before Him, and set His footsteps on the path” (צֶדֶק לְפָנָיו יְהַלֵּךְ וְיָשֵׂם לְדֶרֶךְ פְּעָמָיו).